I have found such a beautiful reason to live today. It's not money, or success, or closing a deal, or my car, or my home, or "my family", or any other "impermanent" thing I could list as a cause. In fact, the reason I found to live today is somewhat different than a thing, in fact it is nothing at all (yes, I seem to love that play on words). Let me explain.
Today I had conversations with two old and dear friends. I have not seen these friends in at least 15 years and although they weren't always on the tip of my tongue there were always within the soul that inspires it. What I discovered in those conversations was that despite the gap of time that had elapsed since I last saw them the feeling they created in me had not dissipated at all. The same smile crept up on my lips, the same laugh echoed from my throat, the same joy came crashing from my heart. Certainly we had changed as years passed. Certainly we had experienced life in many different ways, and those experiences had an influence on who we are and how we see the universe. Surely we had all become byproducts of a life formula that is as individual as it is universal. Despite all of that here I was, smiling, laughing, and taking great joy in the fact that these friends were in my present moment.
It came to me in an awesome wave of understanding that felt like the warmth of a fire on a frigid winter's morning. Here was my beautiful reason for living. It wasn't the conversation or the memories or the chance to connect with old friends. It was the joy. I felt as if the moment stood still, that any joy I was providing these people was being returned to me a hundred fold. See, they let me in, and in doing so provided me with an eternal gift, a continuous wave of love and joy that is eternal even if it gets overshadowed from time to time.
I have come to what is, to me, a rather astounding revelation. When I outstretch my hand to someone whether during a fire, or a rescue, or just on the street as another anonymous human Being my outstretched hand is not the gift. No, the gift here is found in the acceptance of my hand. What is the gift in this relationship is not the offer of love but the acceptance of it. The giver of this gift offers me the joy of accepting it, and in that joy I have found an eternity that is indescribable and immutable. The joy I felt in these old friends 15 years ago still existed today. It wasn't new joy, it wasn't new love, it was the same as what as existed since the beginning. The giver and the receiver are impermanent in the flesh but eternal in ripple or wave that we, in our limited ability to communicate, call "Love".
Today I feel inspired to not only accept the gifts of love and joy but to re-gift them to as many as possible in the time I am given. I don't think anyone will mind...
©2011 Thomas P. Grasso All Rights Reserved ☮ ℓﻉﻻ٥ ツ