Indifferent

I find a moment to be "separate",
To view the world around me, 
To see what is there without my conditions, 
To feel what is there without my layers,
To hear what is there without my distraction,
To smell what is there without my congestion,
To taste what is there without spice,
To be where not being seems essential.

I learn this view is not to be separate, 
But is to understand what "together" truly means.
To observe is not to be distinct,
But to understand all that binds us in who we are.
I cannot stand to be apart from you,
Basking in my human loneliness,
Toiling in your creation of "me" and what that means,
Or suffering in my creation of "you" and what that means.


There are times when I wish I had no such thoughts,
When I could just stay asleep and not awaken.
There are times when I just wish I could put it all away,
When I could just have a box and never deal with its contents.
Why do I care to know about me? Or about you?
Why do I listen to those who say I am not built for these endeavors,
Or to myself who suggests I am?
The answer will come in times own finality.


For now I will continue the struggle,
When I beg for a touch that never comes,
When I long for the sketch of playfulness that never gets drawn,
When this place doesn't like an invisible, distant shore.
For now I will be who I am, or who I was,
Or who you wish me to be,
Because I know nothing else and can only see what is around me.


There is no failure in the art of trying,
There is only failure in the goal set beyond the limits of reality,
To that, I will remain indifferent. 


 

©2010 Thomas P. Grasso All Rights Reserved ☮ ℓﻉﻻ٥ ツ